Adoption "Situations"

Learning the ropes of adoption seems to be equivalent to learning a new language. Every new step is completely new territory for us. So much to learn.

We finally got 100% approved with Act of Love agency a week ago.

In this next stage, the term "situations" is a big deal. If the agency has a birthmom that seems to match our criteria, then they show us her situation. A "situation" is everything they know about the mom, including all sorts of details about her parents, siblings, grades, ethnicity, health, drug use, ETC. It is packed with as much information as possible. Included in her situation, is an itemized list of the cost. Each adoption costs a different amount. It depends on if she needs help with housing, food, medical costs, counseling, etc.

We read over the situation, and have to decide if it's a situation we would be comfortable accepting. After we sign some paperwork, the agency sends the birthmom a handful of adoptive family profiles (including our story, pictures, etc) and the mom gets to choose a family. Once we are chosen, we are considered "matched". Then we wait for the due date. And prepare to sign 100 other forms once the baby is born.

Today we got our first SITUATION. My heart stopped when I saw the email come through. I was so nervous/excited/anxious to read about this mother. Dave was on the phone with me so I read it all to him. This baby is a girl due in June. The downside about this situation is that the price is incredibly high. The mom needs all sorts of financial help. The problem is, if the mom changes her mind, a huge chunk of the money we would pay (we pay it all up front, once we are matched) we could lose. All of the money that goes towards her living, counseling, medical, etc, and that is used, never gets returned to us. It is a pretty big chunk of change to risk losing without having a baby to come home with us.

But most of all, there are no bells ringing saying that this baby is the one. So we will be patient (try, that is) and wait for the next situation to come along.